its been proven that a hug can improve your happiness by around 20 %
I need a hug. the day started of quite well I woke feeling rested which is unusual for me ( 5 hrs sleep is considered a good nights sleep to me ) I put on my suit to get ready for my interview and thought I do actually scrub up quite well. My interview was a total joke tbh. Firstly they lied to me during my first telephone interview they claimed it was a 90% fresh food establishment and a small chain, its one of the biggest brewery lead chains I know of and having worked for them before I know for a fact that it is not 90% fresh. Then today been the second interview I arrived to be given an application and asked to fill it out ( not an issue ) the area ops manager then read through it and saw I had previously been employed by them and commented than she didn't know this, its on my cv for heavens sake and she was the one that had approached me saying she had read my cv grrrrr. Ive saved the best part till the end the ops manager actually hates me. Ive called her a idiot amongst other things on several occasions in the past, somehow I don't think I'll be getting a call back.
Then the evening and night time comes this is the loneliest time in the world for me. This time of the day is when I spent most of my time with S, so its now when I feel the loss of her more than ever and with that the sadness and loneliness really kicks in. She was my light in the darkness, my ever lasting love, my day dreams, my first and last thought of the day she filled my dreams and my every waking moment and most of all she was MY S, ( very possessive I know but she was )
Been the self doubter that I am, I end to think about thins far to much. today's subject of choice was things I've screwed up, I'll not bore you with all the details but here's the highlights school ha what a joke, my history of accidents in and on things is well documented, slightly more serious my marriage. to be honest that was based on my lonliness and self doubt yes I thought I Loved her but the truth is i thought nobody else would have or want me, there I've said it out loud damn she'll hate me if she reads this. more recently I feel I've hurt a friend because of my been an ass, for this I am truly sorry, they do read this and if you have read my pervoius freindship post you'll know I won't give up on repairing that freindship, I am honestly so disapointed in my actions and hope one day we can repair our friendship, I love all my friends so dearly.
Yes I know I have many many many positives in my life I have 3 amazing, beautiful and wonderful children, I have true, real and supportive friends, I have a family that love me that inclueds extended famliy ( you kow the ones that are classed as famliy brother from another mother and sister from anther mister type thingy) and I have known a love thats so true and intense words don't come close, so yes I have soooo much to be thankful for too but sometime you just need that hug to help.
Free hugs start here
I need a hug. the day started of quite well I woke feeling rested which is unusual for me ( 5 hrs sleep is considered a good nights sleep to me ) I put on my suit to get ready for my interview and thought I do actually scrub up quite well. My interview was a total joke tbh. Firstly they lied to me during my first telephone interview they claimed it was a 90% fresh food establishment and a small chain, its one of the biggest brewery lead chains I know of and having worked for them before I know for a fact that it is not 90% fresh. Then today been the second interview I arrived to be given an application and asked to fill it out ( not an issue ) the area ops manager then read through it and saw I had previously been employed by them and commented than she didn't know this, its on my cv for heavens sake and she was the one that had approached me saying she had read my cv grrrrr. Ive saved the best part till the end the ops manager actually hates me. Ive called her a idiot amongst other things on several occasions in the past, somehow I don't think I'll be getting a call back.
Then the evening and night time comes this is the loneliest time in the world for me. This time of the day is when I spent most of my time with S, so its now when I feel the loss of her more than ever and with that the sadness and loneliness really kicks in. She was my light in the darkness, my ever lasting love, my day dreams, my first and last thought of the day she filled my dreams and my every waking moment and most of all she was MY S, ( very possessive I know but she was )
Been the self doubter that I am, I end to think about thins far to much. today's subject of choice was things I've screwed up, I'll not bore you with all the details but here's the highlights school ha what a joke, my history of accidents in and on things is well documented, slightly more serious my marriage. to be honest that was based on my lonliness and self doubt yes I thought I Loved her but the truth is i thought nobody else would have or want me, there I've said it out loud damn she'll hate me if she reads this. more recently I feel I've hurt a friend because of my been an ass, for this I am truly sorry, they do read this and if you have read my pervoius freindship post you'll know I won't give up on repairing that freindship, I am honestly so disapointed in my actions and hope one day we can repair our friendship, I love all my friends so dearly.
Yes I know I have many many many positives in my life I have 3 amazing, beautiful and wonderful children, I have true, real and supportive friends, I have a family that love me that inclueds extended famliy ( you kow the ones that are classed as famliy brother from another mother and sister from anther mister type thingy) and I have known a love thats so true and intense words don't come close, so yes I have soooo much to be thankful for too but sometime you just need that hug to help.
Free hugs start here
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